I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
Randomize
