He is an equal opportunity slut.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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