She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
Randomize
