I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
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