I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
