I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Randomize
