He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
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