Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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