After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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