Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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