Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
