Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize
