My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
I have post one night stand depression
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
Randomize
