My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
