Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
