no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Randomize
