People with herpes should wear stickers.
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
