the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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