the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
