I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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