I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize