The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize
