Only a mothe r could love this liver
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
That accounts for only three of the penises
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
