I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize