and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
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