I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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