So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
