i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
He keeps bees of course he's weird
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Randomize
