I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
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