I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
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