News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
false alarm, still single
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
