oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize