man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
