I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
After tacos, we're chasing women.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
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