you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
I'm at about main and main street
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize
