Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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