everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
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