At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
