Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
