Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
