a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Randomize
