oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
Randomize