I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Randomize
