:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
My phone has seen less use in the last three days than Tom Brady's condoms.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
