Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
