shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Randomize
