Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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