I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize
