it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize
