i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
Randomize
